Saturday, February 9, 2013

life

Where have the years gone?  I glance in the mirror and see new wrinkles and new grey hairs appear daily.  My children who were once small and cuddly are now almost bigger than I am.  The smallest one, not so small any longer.  I have no idea how the time could have galloped, unheeded, ahead of me.  I wasn't ready for the lazy afternoons to be gone and now be piled high with school work and life.  When did they become smarter and wiser than me? 

I see in the not so distant future the years of adolescence looming large and breathing down our necks.  How will we navigate these waters that everyone seems to hate so much?  Will our children grow up and be God chasers or self-consumed?  Will they learn from my mistakes and boldly make their own?  Will they realize that they are wonderfully and awesomely made, simply because God made them, not because they shop at the right stores or have the latest hair styles?  Will they refrain from judging others just because their sin looks differently than ours?  Will they seek to love before being loved?  All of these questions bubble up and over as I sit down with my prayer journal.  How do I, a person who fails more than I succeed it seems, how will I, with my husband, lead them through each day?  The curser blinks on and off for what seems like an eternity before the answer comes to me...by seeking to be led and not just to lead.   I trust in Adonai and acknowledge Him in all of my ways and He will direct my paths. 

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