I am an ordinary 37 year old mom who happens to homeschool. I am average height, average hair color, average in every single way.
And that used to really bother me. Training to become a ballet dancer is rigorous, competitive, and cut throat. The worst thing in the world to a young girl aspiring to be a great ballerina is to be told that she is simply ordinary, nothing special, nothing that would make someone sit up and take notice. That means the dreams she holds in her heart of dancing Sugar Plum fairy in the Nutcracker and Odette in Swan Lake will either take place in one of three ways. As she sleeps, in her living room floor with her family or her stuffed animals roped in to be her audience, or across a page as her pen tells the story she wished she'd lived.
This hope, these dreams kept me at odds with God for a long, long time. I wanted so badly to look a certain way, to have been shaped and formed so that I could catch an artistic director's eye. There seemed to be more than enough ordinary going around.
Fast forward twelve years since I last entered a ballet studio to take class, ten years since I last slipped on a pair of pointe shoes, and eight years since I pulled on leotard and tights. I have discovered something I wished I had grasped with both hands all those years ago, all those auditions when I sat weeping with disappointment. I am ordinary because that is how God best saw to form me.
Why does the clay pot say to the potter 'why did you form me this way?'
Hello, my name is Sunshine. I am an ordinary 37 year old mom who happens to homeschool. However, I am loved and was created by the most extraordinary, holy, awesome God.