Sunday, November 17, 2013

Praise You In this Storm (Lyrics in Italics from Casting Crown - link at bottom of post)

I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining

This has been a hard year for us.  It started around Christmas time last year, and it has literally been one thing after another.

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

There are times that I have to be honest and say I don't even hear Your whisper.  My knuckles are white from gripping as hard as I can.  I am clinging to You, to Your Word.  And still the hard days keep rolling out and over and around us.

And I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

You and YOU alone are worthy of my praise.  You are good all of the time, even when the things in my day to day life seem to scream, 'this is too hard, too much', everything that happens has to go through You first.  You are faithful and just.  You are good and holy.  You are sovereign.  You and You alone are God.

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to you
And you raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You

There have been days, weeks, and sometimes months where I feel like I cannot find You.  It is so silent.  I grab my Bible and I read, but feel nothing, no reassurance, no peace.  I pray and journal and seek You and I feel like you are not to be found.  But n the quiet, after my tears are spent the thought comes that 'faith is not a feeling'.  I take a deep breath, dry my cheeks, and chuckle.  Indeed it is not.  Your Word does not lie.  You have promised over and over never to leave me or forsake me.  I must hold on to that.  Because when it is all said and done that is all the matters anyway, right?

But as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

Thank You God.  Thank You for the hard days.  For the sick days.  For the injured days.  For the emotional days.  For the days when my heart feels like it is going to stop and not beat correctly.  Thank You for the knee injury, for a husband who comes and scoops me up and dries my tears and loves me enough to sit by the bathtub to make sure I am safe.  Who will get up super early to help me with the doggie.   For three kids who have put my socks on for me, who have gotten me water, and carried my meals to and from the table for me.  Thank You for an awesome Pediatric Neurologist for my child, for compassionate and kind doctors and nurses.  For medications that help, for friends who write and call and encourage.  Thank You for offers of help, for emails, and cards.  Thank You for the silent days because it has caused me to dig deeper and lean harder.  Forgive me for when I have grumbled, complained, and cried tears of self pity.  You are so incredibly faithful and patient.

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth

Casting Crown Lyrics

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