Wednesday, March 8, 2017

OK I give up

I need the simple joy in life of having a little bit of chocolate every day.

Life is hard in our house.  Some days all I can say at bed time is, "Well, honey, we survived.  Barely, but we did it,"

I was in tears by the time my husband got home last night.  It had been another hard day.  Our house is a mess, school did not go well, medical issues flared up...sigh.  It was just one of those days.  And I learned something about myself.  A little bit of chocolate is a simple joy for me.  I feel like this challenge is an awesome challenge and I would like to continue the no dessert, no extra sugary things...but I cannot do the thirty days without chocolate right now.  My husband said the challenge is a great idea, the timing was simply not right for us, at this point in time.  I did go a whole week without any chocolate and really, really limited sugar.  I didn't miss the extra sugar, but boy did I REALLY, REALLY miss the chocolate.

God gives grace to get through things, even things we do not like and would not have chosen.  I was a HUGE caffeine consumer, the larger the cup, the more caffeine, the better in my opinion.  And then one day about three years ago I suddenly stopped being able to have any caffeine at all.  It was rough.  I love coffee.  I love the smell, the taste, every thing about it.  An ice cold coca-cola?  Nothing better on a hot summer afternoon.  But I couldn't have any coffee or any pop that had even the smallest amount of caffeine in it, not even decaf at first.  It was hard, but God gave me the grace to get through it.  It didn't feel impossible.

This felt impossible.  So I know the timing is wrong.  It taught me something about myself though.  I can't just jump into things without counting the costs.  Being the parent of children with special needs, challenging days, and roller coaster medical issues, that changes the playing field.

No comments:

Post a Comment