In Looking Back Part 2

 My girl, 

Thank you for sharing your little guy with me.  Thank you so much for letting me have a front-row seat to all of the joy and excitement and snuggles Arendale brought to our lives.  From the moment he arrived in 2016 (top picture), he literally just bubbled over with personality.  

He.was.always.into.something.  

And that got him into so much trouble, didn't it?  In fact, no matter how hard we tried to keep him out of trouble, he consistently found himself right smack in the middle of it.  But you know what?  We loved him even more for it, didn't we?  

I am so sad that he is gone.  I miss him so much and know that you do too. 

Since he was such a sweet, sweet dog...I want everyone to know him, so I am going to write a post of 'do you remember when...?'.  That way, as the years' pass and life happens, we will not forget puppy, duppy, doo and the daily joy he brought to our lives.  

Do you remember this cone?  And the emergency surgery?  And how this cone is the reason we found out he was letting himself out of his cage???

Do you remember when we carried him from his cage to the kitchen to eat every morning and night and we would sing "Here comes Arendale curly tail, careening down the foody trail" (set to the tune of 'Here Comes Peter Cottontail') and he would swim his feet as fast as he could.  We couldn't let him loose to run, because he would run as fast as he could to Buddy or Tanner's dishes and choke on their food.

Do you remember when we had to perform the heimlich maneuver on him?  How scary that was??? 

Do you remember how he knocked his litter mates over and out of the way to come see you when we went to see the litter for the first time?  From that first moment, he loved you.

Do you remember this picture?  Here is a perfect example of what he did when you left a room.

Do you remember how he got his nickname 'Duppy'?  We would say Puppy, Duppy, Doo we love you.

Do you remember how every time we came home from the dentist's office he would repeatedly sniff our knees for some reason?  Specifically the backs of them?

Do you remember the one time we took him to board at the vet and we tried to explain how much he loved food and how careful they had to be to push his food down into his maze dish because he would literally eat past the point of choking (he literally almost passed out one time because he was choking and still was shoveling the food in).  Anyhow, we came to pick him up and the tech said, "Ummm he is very motivated by food.  The dog next to him accidentally knocked his food dish over and kibble went everywhere, so Arendale stuck his paws out of his cage and tried to shovel as much as he could reach into his mouth"

Do you remember how very much he loved you????  When you left a room, he would get this really instense look on his face, waiting for you to come back.  I don't know how many times I came walking down the hall to see the two of you like this

Do you remember asking him to 'speak' and he would???  Here he is "wooooofing".

Do you remember when I wouldn't let him up on a curb because I knew he was going to eat all of the acorns?  So he walked backwards and literally backed up onto the curb to get up there.  

Do you remember how his favorite command was to sit?

Do you remember how excited he got outside and would run like a crazy dog in circles?  Do you remember how much he loved to chew on the chair?  And you kept it even after it became unusable saying it had duppy prints?  

Do you remember how much he loved going on walks and the neighbor's sprinklers?  Or the summer he played with the hose in our backyard.  He would pounce on it trying to catch the water and picked it up and shook it.  Don't forget we have a slow-motion video of that.

Do you remember how much Arendale loved to climb into the dishwasher?  And how many times we walked into the kitchen to find that he'd once again nosed the door open, climbed up, and inspected, licked, and sniffed every.single.dish. he could reach?  How many loads of dishes do you think we rewashed?

Do you remember discovering him lose in the bedroom and the 'circle of destruction' he had made?  Or the time we came home from the store to find him loose in the house and all of the things he had been into?

Do you remember how much he loved to sit on Daddy's electric blanket last winter, would lean into my side while Daddy and I watched Mentalist?

Do you remember how he would curl into the small ball and curl right into our sides during quiet time?  Do you remember how he recognized his medicine alarm on my phone ("Let It Go") and how excited he got when we forgot that that was 'his' song and we were watching "Frozen"?

Do you remember when we had to take all three of your beds off of the stands because when he crawled under there he was chewing off the connector pieces that locked the stands safely into place?

Do you remember how much he loved to smell flowers?

Do you remember how much he loooooooooved snow?  Do you remember frosting kisses?  Do you remember how much he loved knee-burt?  How much he loved peanut butter?  How much he hated getting his nails clipped?  Do you remember how sweet he was?  And his puppy kisses he loved to give?  Do you remember how he continually tried to dig a tunnel to china?  Do you remember how much he loved apples and how delicately he would bite into them, and then he would lick it and his tongue would wrap almost all the way around the apple, he had a giraffe tongue.  Do you remember how we could NOT figure out why he cowered when we stepped over the gates?  Only to realize how often we tripped over them and how scary that must have looked to have us come flying in, arms flailing and flapping trying to catch ourselves so that we didn't accidentally squish him?  Do you remember the hole he ate in the wall?  The time he chewed on a cement block, the gates, the baseboards???  When he figured out how to unhook and release the gate lever?  Do you remember how much he loved Daddy's beard?  Do you remember how much he hated to help me take out the trash after the unfortunate incident?  He would run around like a crazy wild dog with excitement and unfortunately one morning when I lifted the lid to throw the trash in, there was quite a bit of very, very cold water and it landed right on top of him.

Do you remember the time he tried to play with you and me, while we were playing Mickey Mouse?

Do you remember how hard it was to get him to focus on anything?  He had the attention span of a fruit fly unless it involved food.  And then nothing you did or said would distract him from it.

 We took this picture two summers ago, it was at the end of a very, very long day - I was really tired.  We tried to get him to look at the camera to take his picture, he finally did...

only a split second later something moved or made a noise...and that was the end of picture time.

Do you remember when I took him on a walk one afternoon after his nap time and he started peeing?  Well, unbeknownst to him a squirrel, equally as sleepy stood right beside him looking in the opposite direction.  At the same moment they turned and locked eyes and I am not quite sure who was more surprised but Arendale went nuts, dove after Mr. Squirrel, who thankfully was wide awake by then and able to quickly dart away.

Do you remember the time he tripped up the curb, turned, and tried on the opposite side, only to trip again?

Do you remember when you tried his little dress on him and how it barely fit?

Do you remember when I had the GREAT idea to put him in his cage with the elephant stuffed doggy toy that had the really cute peppermint on its tummy?  And a few minutes later we heard a weird sound so we went to check on him, this is all that was left of that poor elephant and he had that squeaker in his mouth, trying his best to eat it.  This also reminds of the time that he gutted his doggy bed, but he did it from the underside so we didn't notice for a few weeks.  We could NOT figure out the tufts of hairy furry stuff (what do they stuff those things with????) that would float around on the kitchen floor, and we kept trying to figure out why his bed was looking so flat...until one day I caught him with his head under it.  I picked it up and could NOT believe how much of that bed he had eaten.

Do you remember when we filled plastic tubs with books to set in front of most of the cabinets in the kitchen to keep him out and we came in the kitchen to see him doing this?

Do you remember in September when I decided to pull all of our Christmas DVD's out and put them on the kitchen island table, so I could get a shelf ready for them?  And one morning, not too long after that I was trying to hide from him and eat breakfast.  I looked over and saw that he had me all figured out.  😄

But most of all, do you remember how very much we loved him?

💕

And that brings me to the last moment that I held him in my arms, that horrible morning in October.  And the vet whispered, "OK little guy, let's go to sleep for the last time."  I miss you sooooo much. I am so sorry.  Please forgive us.  Goodbye, sleep tight.  We love you.

In Looking Back part one

My Reading Challenge - 

First of all, this is the first year that I actually tried the Tim Challies' reading challenge.  I have printed it off several years in the hopes and intentions that I would somehow, someway make time for it.  I love to read, but unless I am intentional about carving out that time for a specific book, I wound up with dusty bookshelves that are more for decoration than use, and gazing upon them from time to time thinking, 'I really need to read that or I really want to read that...'.  

Very frustrating to say the least.

Although I already read a ton for our school days, it's just not the same, I wanted to read for myself.  I wanted to increase what I had to offer to my girls, I wanted to have a thing that was just for me, I wanted to have a place to go when days are long and hard and leaving the house is out of the question.  Little did I know what this year had to offer, and how the books I had chosen last December/January would meet me right where I needed them.  Only God could do something like that.

SO, here is what I read. I read each month, just some months I took the time to write a blog post about them, and some I didn't - this was a really, really tough year for my family and me.  And inevitably, I have forgotten to include some titles here.  Yes, what I read is different and less than what I had planned for (and pulled off the shelves in preparation), but I am still SO SO happy with how this goal turned out.  (PS I already have my list for the new year 👀 and can't wait to try again)

January: 

Monsters in the Hollows

Stella by Starlight

Freedom Crossing

Best Family Ever

Boxes of Butterflies

A Chance to Die

The Curate of Glaston

April: (I read each month, just some months I took the time to write a blog post about them, and some I didn't).

All The Light We Cannot See

The Lady's Confession (book 2 of Curate of Glaston trilogy)

How to Enjoy Reading Your Bible

Refugee

June:

Night of the Full Moon

Isaiah 53 Explained

Redemption, Remember, Return, Rejoice, Reunion

July: (both posts, the first one is just about books, the rest of the list is included at the bottom of the second post)

Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up

Sweep

Dot Journaling, a Practical Guide

Waiting on God

Expectation Corner

Alice in Wonderland

The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes

Harriet Tubman (Christian/History Heroes Then and Now)

Katie Parker book 5

Secret Garden

Suffering

October:

The One and Only Ivan

Mulan

Fear Gone Wild

Uncovering the Logic of English

Unoffendable

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Save the Date 

November and November:

The Harbringer

Forever Your Girl (Katie Parker book 6)

The Holiday Husband

The Rock, The Road, and The Rabbi

The Reading Promise

December:

Christmas Picture Books 

Come, Thou Long-Expected Jesus

A Christmas Carol

Down, Not Out by Chris Cipollone

The Harbringer II, the Return

We also read through the Book of Job this summer and should complete the Book of Luke today.

In Looking Back, In Being Mindful, In Looking Forward

First of all, I am going to pause my posts on the Works of God because have a lot I want to post this week to tie up our year.  I do plan to pick them back up next week because I am learning so much and I don't want to forget any of it.  This blog will one day be a snap-shot of sorts for my girls, a wordy-scrapbook that will provide them with small, minute snapshots of what our lives looked like when they were ten, twelve, fourteen, sixteen, eighteen etc;  

So this week I want to look back.  

I want to write some posts that capture what I read and how the words helped shape my heart, what we watched and how it shaped our connections, what we learned and how it stretched us and grew us, and finally what we said goodbye to and how that has changed us.

I want to be mindful.

And I don't mean in the meditative sense that has become so popular, I mean I want to write a post that literally takes stock of who I am as this year draws to a close and another one is on the cusp of dawning.  I want to still for a moment, quiet myself, and try to somehow give words to how I fill the space and time that God has given me for today.

I want to look forward.

I want to list my habit goals for the year, what I am striving for, and why.  What I hope to read this year, what I hope to watch and listen to, what I hope to learn, and how I hope to grow in 2021.  

Truthfully, I am a bit (ok, maybe more than a bit???) nervous about the new year.  I can't help but think back to this week last year when I was discouraged with a lackluster 2019.  For me, 2019 was a year that held almost NO growth at all, very little forward movement across the board, and so I was really excited about 2020.  I sat almost in the exact same spot I am in this morning, typed on this exact same old laptop, and let my heart dwell on all of the possibilities this new year could bring.  I was, as we always are, so VERY clueless about what all this year would entail  For the world, for my state, city, and community, but most of all for my family.  So, in my angst, I am leaning into the Word, leaning into what I am learning about holiness.  God is holy, holy, holy.  And that needs to drastically alter how I approach everything, how I see and process everything.  And He asks of me, requires from me, personal holiness.  And that needs to drastically alter how I approach this new year. 

Finally, two resources, ok three, that I would recommend as you prepare to lay one year down, and take another one up - Grace Goals by Arabah Joy, RC Sproul's lectures on Holiness (I am not overly-familiar with Ligonier Ministries, other than to know that it says you can watch this series for free right now.  I know they offered a lot of their content for free this year due to covid - but if that changes, or if these specific lectures are not freely accessible when you click on the link, look them up on you-tube - they are there too), and finally, JC Ryle's book  Holiness: For the Will of God is Your Sanctification (this is free on kindle). 

Merry Christmas

 

YouVersion

For unto us a Child is born,

to us a Son is given,

and the government shall be upon His shoulders.

And He will be called

Wonderful Counselor,

Mighty God, 

Everlasting Father,

Prince of Peace. Isaiah 9:6

This means everything.  

What is grace? part 2

Since the focus of my quest is to figure out what 'good works' are, I just want to quickly tie up what they aren't (in other words there is a LOOOOOOOT more to learn, study, and meditate on about grace than what I am typing here).

So, yesterday, I typed out the strong's definition of grace that I felt like Paul was alluding to with his use of the word 'grace' in verses 5.7, & 8. Today I want to type out those verses in several translations.  

Ephesians 2:5, really begins in verse 4, so Ephesians 2:4,5 reads :

NIV But because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions - it is by grace you have been saved. 

NLT But God is so rich in mercy, and He loves us so much that even though we were dead because of our sins, He gave us life when He raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God's grace that you have been saved!)

NASB But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ, (by grace you have been saved)

So clearly, really as clear as can be, Paul is stating a fundamental truth, salvation is not to be earned, it is freely given by grace.  It is by God's goodwill - His loving-kindness, His favor, His merciful kindness that we are saved.  It is by God exerting His holy influence upon our souls, turning them to Christ - in this way, He doesn't just save us, but keeps us, strengthens us, increases us in Christian faith, in Christian knowledge, in Christian affection, and kindles us to exercise the Christian virtues. (used the strong's definition here).  

We did nothing to merit salvation, we did nothing to earn it.  Really, how can you earn something when you are stone-cold dead in your sins?  You can't.*see Ephesians chapter 2 in its entirety, Romans 5:8, Colossians 2:13, Titus 3:5.  

OK - now for verses 6 through 9

NIV And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with Him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order that in the coming ages He might show the incomparable riches of His grace, expressed in His kindness to us in Christ Jesus.  For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith - and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God, not by works, so that no one can boast. (emphasis mine)

NLT For He raised us from the dead along with Christ and seated us with Him in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ Jesus.  So, God can point to us in all future ages as examples of the incredible wealth of His grace and kindness towards us, as shown in all He has done for us who are united with Christ Jesus.  God saved you by His grace when you believed. And you can't take credit for this; it is a gift of God.  Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. (emphasis mine)

NASB and raised us up with Him, and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the ages to come He might show the surpassing riches of His grace and kindness towards us in Christ Jesus.  For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God, not as a result of works, so that no one may boast. (emphasis mine)

So 'good works' are NOT to earn salvation.  They are NOT something we do apart from God, after all, He had to save us - literally, revive our hearts back to life and enflesh them again - Ezekiel 11:19, 36:26, Jeremiah 31:33, 2 Corinthians 5:17.  Salvation did not, nor does it ever, begin with me.  Think of it this way, when someone goes into cardiac arrest, a nurse, doctor, EMT, or someone who knows how to do CPR - THEY initiate the life-saving measures.  Or someone who is choking, or drowning...in those moments you can do nothing for yourself, you can't perform the necessary life-saving measures.  Being dead in your sins is the same way, you can't do 'good works' to fix it, a dead person cannot save themselves.  

OK tomorrow is Christmas Eve, so I am not sure if I will post or not, but I am excited about all that I am learning.  

what is grace? part 1

In my study of good works, the concept of grace seems to always be closely intertwined, so I better figure out exactly what grace is and what it isn't. I started in the book of Ephesians because a few years ago one evening I was really struggling with anxiety and worry over my girls' futures.  I wondered how in the world will they navigate life in light of all that they struggle with and what will that look like.  Anyway, as  I was stewing or marinating in the muck and mire of 'what if' thinking, God showed me a verse in Ephesians and it was as if the hallelujah chorus went off.  Here was a promise I could grab onto and hold tight - it says:

For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.  (Eph. 2:10 NIV)

I didn't spend too much time that evening worrying over what exactly good works were - I just grabbed hold of the promise, the reassurance that God was not caught off guard by their struggles, that He is not up there in heaven gazing down, wringing His hands.  That, praise God, He prepared for them in advance, praise His holy name that they were created in Christ Jesus to do what He purposed for them to do, and how thankful I truly am for the reassurance that these three are His handiwork - He knit them together in my womb and they are fearfully and wonderfully - beautifully made (Psalm 139).  I pulled out a piece of cardstock, my last one of that kind, it's decorated like an old fashioned Pooh Bear postcard, and I wrote out that promise, with each of their names and placed it on our chest of drawers in our (my and my husband's) bedroom.  

But in my quest to figure out what exactly good works are and what they are not, I trekked back through the Bible until I reached the book of Ephesians.  Ironically, as I was filling out my Tim Challies reading challenge last week I texted my mom and asked her for a book recommendation so I could fill that slot in - she recommended the book of Ephesians 😍.

In case I forget to mention it again, the primary tools I will be using are:  my NASB Bible, my Life Application Study Bible (NIV) that my mom gave me last year for Christmas and my Blue Letter Bible and Bible Hub apps.  

OK, so beginning in Ephesians chapter 2, it mentions grace in verses 5,7, & 8.  Using the Blue Letter Bible app, I find out that the word grace is from the Greek word charis.  I believe this usage points to the following - good will, loving-kindness, favour - of the merciful kindness, by which God, exerting His holy influence upon souls, turns them to Christ, keeps, strengthens, increases them in Christian faith, knowledge, affection, and kindles them to the exercise of the Christian virtues.  

OK, so lunch is almost ready, (meatloaf and scalloped potatoes and corn - yummy!) so I better stop here today, but hopefully will pick back up tomorrow - until then - have a great day 💕

Works of God

Lately, the phrase 'works of God' has appeared everywhere for me, or so it seems.  

It all began a few months ago when I signed up for and printed out Grace Goals, and several verses referenced 'works of God', and I thought 'hmm' what exactly does that mean, and how can I determine what that is?  

But then life happened and I forgot to look deeper.  

Then, a few weeks ago I heard a sermon and the person who preached it mentioned the importance of the works of God...which got me thinking...again.  

While that phrase is thrown around a lot, and I have read verses that talk about it a LOT, I don't actually know what that phrase fully entails.  So I wrote and asked the person who preached the sermon to shed some light on what they meant when they were saying 'works of God'.  I also pulled out my phone and utilized the Blue Letter Bible app and did some digging on my own, using one of the verses he referenced to see if I could get some ideas.  Perhaps, if I figured out what he meant, then that would shed some light on what exactly good works refers to and I could know if I was moving in the right direction or not.  

He did follow up with me, and with a sermon, but still, I am not sure that I have it nailed down, that I have settled this matter in my mind and my heart in a way that I am confident, in a way that I can say I do the works of God in my life, faithfully.  Do some verses simply mean your vocation?  While others refer to your roles in life that God has given you - like being a wife, mom, homeschool teacher, etc;  Or do they all actually just speak of spiritual disciplines and what we sometimes refer to as random acts of kindness? And once you have settled what exactly you are supposed to do, where/when does His Spirit work this in your heart vs. what are your responsibilities?  

Basically, for me, it narrows down to this - how do I know what a work of God is, how do I know if He has called me to that specific good work/deed?  And, as a side note, why am I just now taking the time to ponder this and ask myself these questions???  So, I am embarking on a study of the 'works of God' and will daily post here, until I have it (somewhat) figured out, just as a way to keep me accountable and moving forward, preventing 'life' from distracting me.  Feel free to leave a comment or a verse if you have any insight.

the hush of the early mornings during advent...

There is something so special about early mornings in the season of advent.  The lighting of candles, brewing of a steaming, fragrant cup of coffee, plugging in of a lighted tree, and then to snuggle up in front of a fireplace heater, and read Come Thou Long Expected Jesus by Nancy Guthrie.  This morning as I sat cuddled up, I thought about what makes our advent so special, even in a year where it looks quite a bit different than in years past.  So I decided to make a list of what will shape our hearts this season - I just adore a good list, don't you?

This season, as we nestle down, and stick closer to home than years past, we have a lot to prepare our hearts, so much to be thankful for, so much more than I realized before I set down to type this up...

A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens - this is the first time we are reading this classic aloud and I could not be more excited about it.  

"The Man Who Invented Christmas" - we watched this movie in preparation for the read-aloud.  My girls have seen cartoon interpretations of the story "A Christmas Carol", but they have never been big on the spooky or ghostly.  At all.  So, I waited to read this classic aloud.  When I saw this movie last year, I knew this would be the perfect introduction to the classic, not to mention a great connecting bridge, as we have read two biographies about Mr. Dickens in years past.

The Book of Luke.  I love Luke's narration of Jesus' birth.  We are reading and discussing a chapter a day.

Advent calendars with chocolates tucked inside.  One of my MOST favorite memories as a kid was this chocolate countdown.  I have continued it with my girls, long after they have outgrown it.  😍

We have collected quite a large collection of picture books over the years.  I am a HUGE fan of picture books.  I have not just used them when my girls were small, but have continued to get them, read them, revel in their beauty and artwork.  There is something about a picture book that can break up a bad day, thaw an angry teenage heart, soothe a grumpy countenance of a too tired momma...in short, these little gems, are simply a necessity.  My favorites?  CHRISTMAS ONES!!!!  Books like:  The Polar Express, Mortimer's Christmas Manger, Humphrey's First Christmas, Room for a  Little One, Mr. Willowby's Christmas Tree, The Channukah Guest, Latkes, Latkes, Good To Eat...

Cindy Rollins', Hallelujah, A Journey Through Advent with Handel's Messiah.  Love, love, love this book.  We own the kindle copy of it because the year I first bought it, it was sold out and kindle was the only choice.  But, if you don't own a copy, and can get one, get it in paperback/hardback.  The setup for this book is SO SO much easier if you have pages to flip to and fro with.

Pandora - my Christmas station. I think Christmas music is so incredibly beautiful.

Christmas movies - I absolutely love Christmas movies - classics, cartoons, cheesy love stories, I adore them so much.

Hot Chocolates.  I have blogged many, many times about my love of hot chocolate.  It used to be a Starbucks treat that I looked forward to.  But due to many different circumstances, I have learned to make them at home this year and I absolutely LOVE them.  (I will share my recipe at the bottom of this post.  I call it my recipe, but I tweaked and combined many ideas I found online, so feel free to tweak and google too 😃 )

Cinnamon sticks in my coffee.  And Teddy Grahams with a mug of coffee 💕

Cookies.  We love to bake this month.  We have some places that will still accept treats (even during covid!) so we have gathered snowman paper plates, ingredients, and a few afternoons await us full of treats and yummies!

My jingly elf slippers and pajama pants.  I get up and get dressed for the day and select a pair of festive pajama pants.  I wear them to appointments, to the store, just about every place except for a church service.  They make me so happy.  

Homemade jewelry with Christmas charms.  Elves, snowflakes, snowmen...we love to make them, wear them, and share them.

Thinking of gifts to give other people.  Most of ours are usually homemade and that means almost always baked.  But don't you just love giving gifts?  

I wish you a beautiful season of waiting and preparing your hearts for the presence of Christ, may He reign supreme in our hearts and in our affections.  

"My" Hot Chocolate Recipe 

(I have highlighted and bold typed ingredients, so you can gather them before you begin)

1/4 cup of water heated

Heaping Tablespoon of unsweetened cocoa powder

Heaping Tablespoon of powdered sugar

combine cocoa and sugar in the water to form a sort of syrup and set aside

A shot of vanilla flavored coffee syrup

16 oz of milk whisked on the stove, or if have an espresso machine, steam and froth your milk, add in your vanilla syrup.

Pour your chocolate syrup in your mug, pour in the hot milk, saving a bit of milk to pour into the cup to get all of the chocolate out.

Heavy Whipping Cream with a smidge of powdered sugar, shake it vigorously and add it to the top of your mug of hot chocolate, sip and enjoy!!