Thursday, December 26, 2013


There is so much heartbreak surrounding me, sometimes it feels suffocating.  So many people I care about hurting, confused, wrapped up in brokenness.  So many words hurled like weapons, so much death and sickness and feels impossible.  Then I lift my eyes beyond my circumstances, my family, my day to day life and I read about Saeed Abedini and although I have never met them my heart hurts for him and for his wife and for their children.  I read about all of the people who lost siblings in car accidents right before thanksgiving...there were so many this year.  I read about a mom who lost her little girl and is now devastatingly heartbroken...on and on it goes.  Sometimes I get stuck in the act of looking around and taking stock of everything that I forget the one thing that is needed.  The one thing that is a lifeline to us when we feel like life is overwhelming or hard or even hopeless.  The one thing I can do for others when I see them hurting and there is nothing I can do to lift or help bear the burden. 


This morning when I was reading my Bible this stuck out to me :
It is from Zechariah in the 8th chapter verse 6
"This is what the Lord of Heaven's armies says : All this may seem impossible to you now, a small remnant of God's people.  But is it impossible for me?  says the Lord of Heaven's armies." 
If you go back and read the whole book, you see that God is promising restoration after His nation has been brought to task for their sins.  But when I read that passage it made me think about all that seems impossible right now.  Some due to my own sin, some due to other's sins, some due to just life happening and hurts unfolding.  It seems so impossible.  Impossible that God will restore.  Impossible that God has retained a remnant for Him, despite the sin that abounds.  Impossible that He can indeed bring good and lovely out of devastation and hurts.  But then I stop, I ask "Is it really ever impossible for God to do anything?"  I mean look at Israel.  His people, His heart.  He has through the ages been faithful.  No.Matter.What.

I am not sure what your walks with God are like, but mine is two steps forward, five backward.  It is so easy for me to read the Bible and see what needs to be done, to agree with and believe the Word, but then when life happens and I am gripped by something like fear or worry or anxiety or hurt to actually pray and ask God show me this is not impossible for Him and then rest in that prayer...that is hard for me.  Because I have realized that while all things are possible for Him, not all things are His will.  That is the hard place to fall on.  That is the hard truth to grasp.  That is where trust comes into play.  This is where I learned that it is essential for me to have a good solid grasp on the character of God.  He is faithful, He is just, He is good.  All of the time good, all of the way good, completely consumed by good.  Good intentions, good actions, good thoughts, good everything.  He.Is.Good.  Even when it hurts, He is good.  He is full of mercy.  He is love.  He is life.  The very breath I breathe, the very substance that sustains me.  He is. 

So no matter where you find yourself today I challenge you, I challenge myself to pray and say, "God I believe You when you say nothing is impossible for You." and then to rest right there.  No 'but' tacked on, no worries creeping in, no looking around you and wondering. 


Tuesday, December 17, 2013

This morning...

Listening to O Come Thou Long Expected Jesus (Christy Nockels) and am drawn in by the incredibly beautiful

Drinking ice cold milk and munching crunchy cereal (I usually do not combine the two)

Watching my candle flame flicker

Listening to my doggies' tag hit the side of his dish while he enjoys his breakfast

Reading Jane Eyre, I have a goal to read one classic a month for the next year

Am sad that Bible in 90 days is over, am thankful for my daily Bible, an anchor

Come Thou long expected Jesus
Born to set Thy people free
From our fears and sins release us
Let us find our rest in Thee

Saturday, December 14, 2013

I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I literally just read the.last.words. in Revelations, but today is day 90 and I DID IT!  It was such an awesome experience.  This is my second time through and I highly recommend it, if you ever get the opportunity, it is awesome!  There is NOTHING that compares to the Word of God.  I come away with questions, and yet, just like last time I am more certain that Jesus is the Messiah than I am of anything else. 

Monday, December 9, 2013

Random Monday Musings

1) Have found a new amazingly awesome author.  Amy Harmon.  WOW!.

2) We are listening to Henry Huggins for quiet time today. Can I just say that makes me ALL kinds of happy?

3) I have discovered a caffeine free herbal "coffee" that I like :).  Teeccino Maya Chocolate

4) Have read about or heard so many heartbreaking stories recently, it makes me so very sad.

5) I am days away from completing my Bible in 90 Days!  It has been SO neat.

6) Thought I had settled on my 2014 Word of the Year, but now I am rethinking it.  There is SO much I want to grasp and know.  SO much I want to conquer and change.  SO much I dream of and want to chase after.

7) I wrote a book last year.  This year I am working on Book Two.  I have spent almost a year trying to narrow down and refine what I want it to be about, I know my characters, but have not been able to get their story out onto paper...well this past month or so I have been able to finally get it off the ground.  I love to write, am so thankful for the gift of simply putting a pen to paper, it is so much fun.

8) It is hard to believe that it is the 9th of December! 

Monday, December 2, 2013

Grace & Random Thoughts

Yesterday my family and I heard a sermon teaching by Wade Burleson on the radio.  I love listen to him teach from the Bible.  It seems like every single week God uses what he says to meet us, literally, right where we are.  Yesterday was no different.  He taught on what the word grace means.  I have heard lots of definitions of what grace is and what grace isn't, but nothing has really clicked with me.

Until yesterday.

Pastor Burleson said this (I didn't have a pen to write it down word for word, but this the gist of it) : grace is when God gives us what we need, not what we deserve, even when we are being antagonistic towards Him.

As a parent that spoke to me on such a deep level.  Immediately different scenarios popped into my mind, you know the ones that make you want to bang your head against a wall in frustration?  You love these kids more than the next breath you take, but they can make you so frustrated it isn't even funny.  As Pastor Burleson unpacked his teaching it occurred to me that God had just equipped me to know exactly how to respond in every single situation, no matter what the details are.  To respond to my kids (or actually anyone) how they need to be responded to, not how they deserve to be responded to.  What a beautiful gift.

As I reflected on the sermon some more,   I thought of Ephesians 4:29 :
New International Version
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen (another version says 'that it may give grace to those who hear)

I hope you guys had an awesome Thanksgiving.  We had some friends over for Thanksgiving dinner and they brought the most delicious green bean casserole, cowboy cookies, and pumpkin bread.  OH MY WORD, it was so good.   I started pt this morning for my knee.  I even got on a bike :)  The past two nights I have been trying to catch up on Downton Abbey, I don't get a lot of TV time, I left off on season 2 last year :(, and am just now getting pick back up where I left off.  I love that show!  Have a great day!