It was intensely brutal.
Miserable.
Long and felt like it would.never.end.
This year has felt in comparison, like a long drink of cool water. It has been so, so much better. One area that I notice a huge difference in: my walk with God. For the past few years I have felt like more days than not, I was clinging on by the tips of my fingers.
God is incredibly faithful (often times we only see this in hindsight because we are so distracted by the storm raging around us) and while He was unmistakably present and faithful and kind and He alone saw us through...but honestly, at the time, it felt like He was so, so silent.
Earlier this year I stumbled upon an Inst*gram account by someone named Georgia Brown. She is just all kinds of lovely, but the one thing that I loved most about her account was the posts she did (*and does) about her prayer closet. She has a book coming out in July called Hi God, It's Me and it is available for pre-order right now!
Anyway, after reading her posts, my girls and I decided to try her idea and it has been amazing. We opted to post our prayer cards down our hallway on all of the doors - starting at our laundry room. Writing down who you are praying for (or what!) and then recording God's answer has been the BIGGEST mind-blowing, faith-building, gratitude-producing thing that I have experienced in a long time (and also very, very convicting and humbling). See, I often times will just shoot up a prayer in the moment, but hardly ever do I return in thanks and marvel at His faithfulness once the answer comes.
And His answers always come.
Even if it isn't what we asked/hoped for...it is from His hands therefore it is His best and covered in His loving kindness. And I often times miss it. And forget to say thank you.
Speaking of loving kindness, as I made my way through the Lent study, one week the Hebrew word 'hesed' kept coming up over and over again. Then when we did Secret Church last week, David Platt drew attention to this word again.
I LOVE this word.
Here is a link to a starting place for exploring this word and how it describes God.
I decided to begin a read-through the book of Psalms, focused solely on how God is revealed in this beautiful book and WOW!!! Truly God is praised and talked about and gloried in and cried out to over and over and over again. I am tracking this journey in Inst*gram and I highly recommend it. Grab your Bible and a pen (if you don't like to write in your Bible grab a journal) and pray - ask God to show you Who He is. And then read and note every single instance God's character is praised, revealed, proclaimed, described...it will blow you away.
One last thought to leave you with...there is another book that is releasing early May (can you believe it is already May next week?!?!) and it is called The Other Side of Special. This book is by three moms - Amy J. Brown, Sara Clime, and Carrie Holt. I don't often talk about our journey through special needs, because my girls do not like to share this journey with very many people, but, this book looks like something that I have been praying for, for a long time. This journey is lonely and it is messy and can be so, so painful. But is achingly beautiful and I wouldn't trade a moment for anything else.
Have a great weekend 💖
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